CRRAAACCCKKKKK!

We're cracking the whip around here. Even more so than usual!

The boys are "testing" out language... not to be finished with his little bus escapade, they now like to do things like have Ryan say "Pirate Ship" (shit)... "ask" (ass)... "apple" (asshole).... "truck" (fuck).... and on & on. Then they laugh uproariously while the poor kid thinks he's done something great. Lately all I've been hearing is Mouth calling everyone a "jacker" (I can just imagine where THAT slang is coming out of!) and Sullen is into "bitch" (as in, "Hey Kevin - say 'b' and I'll say 'itch'... or calling Hannah a bitch & then telling me, who told him what the actual definition was, that she really is one so he should be able to call her one).

So, as you can imagine, the whip has been cracking a LOT around here. Plus we're tired of Mouth's mouth. Right now Sullen is grounded through Thursday; Mouth through Saturday. That's from TV... computer... basically anything electronic outside of their mp3 players that I let them take in the car.

In addition, we're trying to get them to "get" the concept of "Do It Right The First Time". Just add "Quality Manager" to my hat title. The latest "do over" task? They were to toss out the spoiled bird food, which has been sitting on the driveway for 2 months, into the "woods" out back. Well, of course, the little lazy demons dropped it all right by the playset, so Hannah went out and ROLLED in it. She smelled like something had died & decomposed on her. I finally got her hosed off (in the 30 degree weather with cold ass water) and put her to dry in the laundry room (& then had to wash the rugs from there because they smelled like rotten rodents). She then went BACK out, after they were out there TWICE saying they had it all cleaned up, and rolled in more. (See Mommy kill small children.) I made THEM wash her the 2nd time. Today we spent $45 at the groomer to have her REALLY cleaned. (See Mommy re-kill small children.)

At least school conferences went pretty well. I didn't hear anything I didn't expect (Mouth can't control his mouth in class & rushes through everything... and Sullen doesn't ever want to do his work & only wants to read his book). I AM waiting on Mouth's teacher to send him his "poem" that was posted in the hallway (we were oh so proud). I won't spoil the surprise -- I'll post it once it comes home -- but suffice it to say that I called & woke Daddy up in the Arch City to read it to him while we both laughed hysterically (as did another set of twin parents that were walking past & stopped to listen to me reading it).

I figure between the McCormick lack-of-common-sense gene, and the Oxrider ignore-it-and-it-will-go-away gene, I've pretty much given birth to the IDIOT BRIGADE.

Are there enough chemicals in the Eastern world to get me through their adolescence????